With a Shadow of Doubt by Jess Alexander and Cassy Pearson

Title: With a Shadow of Doubt

Authors: Jess Alexander and Cassy Pearson

Year Published: 2023

Link to Buy: Amazon

Genre: Fiction, Romance, Religion, Coming of Age

Summary:
What happens when you can no longer doubt your doubts?

Sariah Anderson, recent high school graduate and oldest daughter of a LDS Bishop, has never felt more free. Sharing an apartment with her one roommate is a dream come true, especially since it means not sharing the bathroom with 6 other siblings. She's finally free to enjoy her first year at the University of Arizona, away from her meddling Mormon family, and eventually settle down with a nice guy she met at church. Everything changes with the entrance of a tattooed and worldly Kai.

He's smart, funny, kind, seriously hot, and seriously not what she's supposed to look for in a man. As their chemistry heats up, so do Sariah's doubts about her faith. The more time she spends with Kai, the less time she wants to be at church. When her parents issue an ultimatum, Sariah is forced to face her growing doubts about the church once and for all. Can Sariah really find happiness after leaving the Mormon religion--and her family--behind? And if she stays, what sacrifices must she make to do so?

Ten Sentence Review:

This book is so much more than a romance; it had me visibly smiling, cringing, and gasping as I read. I felt like I've actually met these characters, and I was so proud of Sariah for thinking for herself on subjects like LGBTQ+ acceptance from the very beginning, even having grown up in the LDS church. Her moments of revelation, one of the most powerful being her realization that her parents care more about their image than their children's happiness, are incredibly relatable even if you didn't grow up LDS. The biggest lesson she learns is that humans are human, regardless of religion, and the level of perfection demanded by the Mormon church is simply not achievable. The authors do a great job of sticking with the theme of doubt and "doubting your doubts" throughout in lots of different scenarios.

With a Shadow of Doubt refreshingly doesn't fall into any romance tropes like big miscommunications or "will they, won't they?" I never once doubted that Sariah and Kai would end up together. The "will she, won't she?" is between Sariah and the church. It's not even between her and God, since her belief in God is hardly mentioned. Abstaining from coffee and alcohol, always dressing modestly, and only socializing with church members all seem like arbitrary rules to Sariah once she's living in the real world, and she stays true to herself from minute one. She finds some sweet secular friends who gently guide her experimentation, and she figures out what feels best for her.

The story of Ros' marriage is very important. It shows the other path Sariah was so close to taking and why she's grateful she didn't. Kai is a man written by a woman and I hope there are really guys like him out there for all the Sariahs of the world. Lennon reminded me a little of myself in college and I loved watching her be true to herself and unapologetically live out loud. Olive and Javier were awesome for getting to know Kai and hear about him before college. All the characters are three-dimensional and relatable in their own ways. There was also extreme diversity in the friend group without it seeming contrived.

Also, I need the sequel desperately because there's definitely stuff going on with Sariah's two oldest siblings and I want to know!!

Okay so this was 19 sentences, not 10, but I really loved this book. 5/5!